..a little too sweet*

monday was maths paper... 70% a level qns from last year... ohhh... i seee... the poison and stinging sensaation from it.. physics paper today.. 1.5hrs? oh shyt! haha.. but overall.. i hope can E it... if not S it.. i dont want to U it.. damn it.. wth laa! why?? paper set to kill..? or am i underprepared?? haix.. whatever it is.. a lesson learnt.. no more no more internet... and and.. CONSTANT revision.. [im gonna take his advice] he's ryte.. haix.. =) lessons learnt..

WILL NOT DO ANYTHING THAT WILL DISAPPOINT MYSELF, MY FAMILY, HIM AND MY TEACHERS.. damn.. im so not keeping my promises.. wth!! sometimes trying is not enough.. i need to produce results.. motivate me please! =(

sometimes i feel im doing too much... but on the other hand... you're not... at times... it just hurts... while i want to be strong... but fear pulls me away from my strength... crying? my only solution out other than ranting non stop and endlessly if i could at this blog if it doesnt and will not cause any eruption of feeling from others as well as hurting them unintentionally... may it be pure coincidental? haix..

at times, i look up in the sky... i remembered the last nyte i was in kL with him... we pondered... and gazed at the dark starless night... looking for our star... but there wasnt any... coincidentally, there's this hotel i think.. across my hotel which wrote "Royal Bintang"... and that became out star... it was hilarious... that nyte... it hurt me like no other... i have no reason to explain myself... but i guess... words cannot explain how i feel... only i know why i felt that way...

if only someone could share this feeling with me... if only someone really can understand how i felt... please help explain to me... why is this feeling so strong... stronger than any other feelings i ever felt... maybe im afraid of losing again... maybe... im just being foolish... i dont know... someone... help me please... =(

i spent more than 12 hrs awake... lacking in sleep... now im like a walking zombie... my fren told me yesterday after maths paper while on my way home.. "eh mala... u macam baru bngn tido ar..." hahaha... i was obviously... im lacking sleep... i sleep for about 5-6hrs... not enough.. i may look ok... but im lethargic inside...