tasuke.menci.menyampah.blah!

hehe.. title tu mmg tak bley blah jew.. saje je.. ehehe.. *slaps self *stabs self *

well people! hehe.. i'll not blog often soon enough.. :) dont miss me.. hahas!! (ngade ngade+prasan+gediks jew.) ehem.. why? hmm.. i'll update whenever i can to get you guys+gurls updated with my life.. but im not sure when.. hehe.. (alasan+excuses!) whenever im free i'll update aites!

actually, haih.. feeling saye sekarang tenga bercampuran ni.. tenga tataw laa.. mixed up.. messed up.. *breathe in, breathe out* perasaan sekarang kecewa, hampa, terkejut, tertipu tersedih? hahs!!! what the hell la okay?

saye dah taknak bercinta agy dah.. next tros kahwin ok? (ye ye jew!) takpe la.. nak match make saye pun takpe.. (btol ke ni?? tpu je dak mala ni.. muke dia.. tknye.. rebel no satu jadinye nnti! habis dia bangkang!) hmm.. ;( i dont believe in love anymore.. after 2 sucky experiences (mmg la lumrah but.. ending dia unfair.. saye tak suke care ia berakhir.. && kesimpulan perasaan hati sane yg senang je ubah.. like memories are nothing.. time spent were pointless.. and love was non-existent.. it gives me the feeling that LOVE NEVER EXISTED!! && i was just a TOY.. PUPPET! A GAME!!)

sebenarnya, memang DAH lame DAH putus cinta+putus harapan... but semalam la kan.. memang la hari paling paling TERPUTUS segala talian.. sedey sangat actually.. but SABAR itu penting kan??? hotak korang la penting sabar tu.. hahaha!! haih..

tak settle lagi mslh ni... actually on his side dah settle [lelaki la kan.. simple and easy as ABC].. on my side [wanita dan susah mcm menyusahkan saye nie..] tk settle sbb kite kan ade our DIFFERENCES.. nk kene settle kan isi hati kandungan naluri [eh? ayat ape ni? gilo jewk. tapi sedap bunyi dia.. makne nye ape? tah tatawww!! ] so nanti la saye sms dia, then call dia.. mahu settle.. tapi cari baik kan kan kan.. takde ugutan+blackmailing.. kalau blackmail awak, saye pun terkene gak.. baik jangan taw.. hihihi..

actually, saye da tak minat pasal topik ni ngan dia.. tapi alangkah peliknye.. hati+mulut+fikiran tak ade dlm frequency yang same.. so, fikiran pun tak same.. and tak menjadi sebab bahawa saya sangat free maka saye banyak berfikir tentang dirimu.. dulu kat kolej pun saye fikir pasal awak kan?? kat kolej, saye ade commitment sebagai malay dancer & setiausaha malay cultural society.. i took the effort to remember because u are someone important.. tak ade alasan bagi pihak saye sbb saye free and tkde keje sangat+commitment otay? hahahahs!! topik ni nanti saye nak argue ngan awak.. :) memang saye jahat! jahat!! mwaahahaha!! saye suke plan sbb sampai masenye.. mulut terkunci.. yang mate air mata je mengalir.. sheesh!

sbb hati terlalu sedih.. saye tak makan semalam & ingat nak STARVE myself.. tapi.. dr saye starve myself.. saye puase je la.. dari melaparkan diri dalam sedih tanpa faedah, saya berpuasa amalan indah [betol ke nie? ape je!] heh..

&& saye gi kluar jalan jalan seorang diri.. muke penat+lebam+pucat.. rambut tk terurus.. macam org bermasalah.. patut la.. org tgk semacam.. haha!! rase rase.. org ingat saye sot dot kot.. booo! bile saye dok umah.. saye memang paling tk kisah cara saye dress up.. mcm maid kot! kekeke.. dah laa.. jgn glakkn saye.. nk wupe cmne.. panda ke ape ke.. huh... buruk ke ape ke.. tkpe..

okay okay.. kene settle ngan kamu taw encik! ;) and let's end it for good aite even if i end up looking worse than the photo u hold and look exactly this way [see pix below]

mase kat skolah dulu. semalaman menangis. ni jadinye.